The collected wine-tastings & wine-ramblings of one who prefers to describe wines with metaphors, not percentages

Wine and sex

A cropped photograph of a woman sexily licking her brightly-lipsticked lipsEach time you have sex, do you give it a mark out of 100?

I think you do not.

Oh, how provocative! Oh, how extreme! Oh, but rating wines is not remotely like rating that other thing. Oh, it’s quite disgusting! Guards! Guards! Take him away!

But wait: I’m just trying to give an account of what I’m doing, here. Because I don’t want to write about wines like an examiner; I want to write about wines like a lover. I want to be shamelessly abandoned, shamelessly subjective, in a pursuit which invites (and is pretty much meaningless without) shameless abandonment and subjectivity.

Not saying there’s no place for ratings out of 100. Not lashing out at nobody who does it. This is about me. My approach. (Yeah, what a fucking egotist I am. But you know this.)

I guess it’s important to be upfront about this. If you want studied objectivity, go elsewhere in your noble quest. Hell, I admire objectivity. But I admire it from a fucking massive great distance. Like a prudent stalker armed with camo gear and good binoculars.

Anyhow. The above explains why my favourite wines are often pretty damn fuckable.

That’s all. As you were.

(Oh, yeah, and this is Old Parn’s 100th blog post. If the earth moved for you at any point, do leave a comment.)

5 Comments to Wine and sex

  1. Penny Goring (@triplecherry)'s Gravatar Penny Goring (@triplecherry)
    July 21, 2011 at 8:39 am | Permalink

    That row of bubbles up top looks like a row of teeth to me – & your page a gaping mouth. Cool.

  2. July 21, 2011 at 8:54 am | Permalink

    this post by @billicatons reminds me of @natalie_shaw’s assorted musings on reviewing things with an n/10 #onlyswearier

  3. July 21, 2011 at 3:23 pm | Permalink

    Wine & sex: an impassioned argument why Old Parn (@billicatons) and Vinopic are perhaps not natural bedfellows

  4. July 21, 2011 at 4:20 pm | Permalink

    I would guess more women actually rank sex up to 100. And for guys just having sex is 100. No? ;) But I know what you mean about the wine.

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