Wine and sex

A cropped photograph of a woman sexily licking her brightly-lipsticked lipsEach time you have sex, do you give it a mark out of 100?

I think you do not.

Oh, how provocative! Oh, how extreme! Oh, but rating wines is not remotely like rating that other thing. Oh, it’s quite disgusting! Guards! Guards! Take him away!

But wait: I’m just trying to give an account of what I’m doing, here. Because I don’t want to write about wines like an examiner; I want to write about wines like a lover. I want to be shamelessly abandoned, shamelessly subjective, in a pursuit which invites (and is pretty much meaningless without) shameless abandonment and subjectivity.

Not saying there’s no place for ratings out of 100. Not lashing out at nobody who does it. This is about me. My approach. (Yeah, what a fucking egotist I am. But you know this.)

I guess it’s important to be upfront about this. If you want studied objectivity, go elsewhere in your noble quest. Hell, I admire objectivity. But I admire it from a fucking massive great distance. Like a prudent stalker armed with camo gear and good binoculars.

Anyhow. The above explains why my favourite wines are often pretty damn fuckable.

That’s all. As you were.

(Oh, yeah, and this is Old Parn’s 100th blog post. If the earth moved for you at any point, do leave a comment.)

5 Replies to “Wine and sex”

  1. Penny Goring (@triplecherry) says: Reply

    That row of bubbles up top looks like a row of teeth to me – & your page a gaping mouth. Cool.

    1. Yes! I’m glad it appears thus to you — as I hoped.

  2. this post http://t.co/3GpocZo by @billicatons reminds me of @natalie_shaw’s assorted musings on reviewing things with an n/10 #onlyswearier

  3. Wine & sex: an impassioned argument why Old Parn (@billicatons) and Vinopic are perhaps not natural bedfellows http://t.co/9Yb3jO8

  4. I would guess more women actually rank sex up to 100. And for guys just having sex is 100. No? 😉 But I know what you mean about the wine.

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